What I think is really NOT what I think it is

Assalamualaikum and good morning everybodyy!

WARNING A REALLY LONG BORING UPDATE WITH WORDS.DON'T TELL ME I DIDN'T WARN YOU.

Whats up?No,its whats up with me not blogging for so so long..?One word : LAZY.
Hmm,I'll only update this blog when its holiday(like now) and at late night/morning (like now too) and its like 5:46AM now.So yeah.This blog is like my get-away place when Im really really dead boring and I don't know what to do yet I don't want to sleep.Sorry blog.Hehe.

Moving along,
How's life? Hmm,as always like a roller coaster.Ups and Downs.

Before that,

I've moved school.Something that I din't really expect will happen,even though I really wanted it to happen(if you read my older post you'll know about this).Its not that I din't expect it to happen,its just that I've lost hope on it cause this happen on September.Its already half of the year and I expect those kind of things to happen where I know those things only happens early of the year.Wait.Are you lost?Im talking about the letter offer of moving school.So,are you back into track?Ok.You know whats the schoking part? I have only less than a week to settle everything -schools,friends,buying stuff. Can you imagine how I had to rush everythings up? And lucky I did. Whats the sad and yet sweetest part is my classmates made a surprise and a video for me at school and my best friends surprise by coming over to my house(where they never did cause I never invite them,yes Im so mean) and bring me to hotel and dinner! And they sing,bought cake and make something like a portfolio about my friendship with them,Urghh just too sweet! And yeah they even printed alot of my pics with them for me to hang in my new school which I did but only in my locker.

Hm,I was really having a hard time that time,in between wanting to move or not.Cause the new school learnt so much and Im way left behind and all,can I even survive there?And Alhamdulillah I did.The first few weeks I admit it was really hard for me to make myself comfortable cause its just so different there,I just miss my friends back in my old school.Things just doesnt goes the same anymore.And I admit yes I cried.A few times.Lol.Thats normal right?And guess what my friends surprise me again by visiting me!They planned the whole thing,thank you to every each of them.I love them so much!After that,my days went well,and I had great time with them.And most importantly my result is better for some subjects,just that I fail add maths again.But I improved a lot,a little bit more to pass.So Im actually proud.Others subject too where I never pass in my whole life(ok maybe not my whole life,just this year) and I pass! With good result.Im really thankful with that.REALLY.Can't say how happy am I.hehehe.

Woah,thats a long explanation.I really do miss my friends ey?wait,I DO.

And now is the holidays,where so much things had happen.Good and Bad,ofcourse.
So Im only staying at home,oh yeah I went to KK last week.Nothing much.Hm,did I mention I have tons of homeworks to be done?Almost every subject! EVERY SUBJECT I TELL YOU.And I only started doing it,its like 1/10 finish.Oh,Im so dead.I only got 3 weeks to finish them all up,cause I'll be having family vacation after this.Im sure I can finish it,right?Chaiyo!

Oh yeah,I barely speak english and chinese in my new school.Uhh,I hope I won't suck in those language.Wait,Im already suck at chinese.Oh well.Haha!

This is a really long post ey?Nvm,its a replacement for not updating for a very loooong time.
And I really need to stop thinking negative thoughts,What I think is really NOT what I think it is.I just need to stop taking things seriously sometime.Ignore the world,just don't give a damn.Its my own fault also those things happen right?So its like i deserved it.I need to change,but yet again its hard..Trust don't just come back that easily right?Like Lady Gaga and Beyonce says Trust is like a mirror..I just hope that everything is going to be fine in the end and all I need to do is stop being so emotional.Oh,and one more thing,I love my parents no matter what,they are the reason why Im here.A friendly reminder to all and myself,I really need to remind that to myself everytime.Its just one thing I need to achieve,to make my parents proud of me.Thats all,I know I've been making alot of mistakes all this time but that doesnt mean I can't make them proud right?I need to work my ass of,as in really!

Ok,lastly..
Time has pass so fast,its December 2012 already and I'll be a senior next year!Ohmy.
No,I still can't believe that.I need to enjoy every second of it and make a memory of it.And before I start this  post I was wasting my time by looking at photos that I've been tagged on my facebook until the last piece of it on my new fb not my old fb,oh yeah thats also my reason why I don't want to delet the old fb.I wanna see the old pics of me.Oh anyway,I've been through so much mostly bomba and with my friends,plus when Im still in primary school.I just can't believe those thing are over now,its just something to be remembered.Thats just sad,don't cha think?

How I wish I can change back into time and watch myself again in live,being there watching myself going through everything.Do you get what I mean?I just miss everything! Im those kind who remembered things where people don't even remember them anymore,well obviously because its something a part of my life and I miss every each of it.Maybe I just need to accept the fact that Im old and I need to move on with my life..

Ok,the sun is already up and I can see them through my curtains,and I haven't sleep.Urgh,who care about sleeping when you should be enjoying every second of your life?This kind of time doesn't come always!You know.What time?Time that ME UPDATING MY BLOG.Haha!Oh yeah,Im on pms now so I hope I don't bother you with my crap and all,haha cause Im bored!

Until the next holiday if Im not lazy enough to update again,Assalamualaikum!

And its 6:28AM now..great.

Life is full with ups and downs

So,today was the so called report card day.

Result sucks.so bad.

and yes I gotta admit that I'm upset about it,well who doesn't?Even others who are busy with activities still get better result than I am.My mind won't stop comparing myself with those better ones &yes I know I should be working hard to improve myself from now on.Atlease to make my own self proud and feel satisfied with myself..don't know why Im really not in the mood after taking my result.It just disappoint me yeah I know I was busy before that but still?!..not that I got last but just a few more.Sometimes I feel like its not fair and being not appreciated..not that Im not thankful enough but sigh..idk

I let my own self down,not mentioning my parents (even if they still don't know yet) and Allah.

but I can feel it.If they don't care,well I do.

Bursting into tears doesn't even help..all this feeling might be gone a week from now on and I might be doing the same mistakes again.or maybe not.who knows?

All i want is..well Allah knows.And amin for that.

I really don't have the mood now,so please don't do anything that make me pissed,seriously.

People might not understand what Im trying to tell here,no one ask you to.Just mumbling craps here..so yeah bye

After so long..

Assalamualaikum..

Miss me?I've been gone for so long aint I?

Yayaa,same old story everytime starting a post.Bored?Well me too!Anyway,here am I again on the holidays,staying up late wasting my time on the net.Well,exams are over! Not really a good news since my grades sucks.Failed add maths,well thats normal I guess? I bet theres more failed subjects lining up behind.Boo on me!Need to put much effort on it,next time.

Been busy with my bomba camp for the national,and yes we did win.And yes,I win! : ) It was a hell of an experience,since everything has change (the competition). Team work is really important,you know.Even had picnic with them bomba members on Saturday,now this time was a hell of a picnic.Not just buy splashing water but by using other stuff for example oil to be wiped on your face and all.Well almost everyone gets it.Obviously I gets it and hated every each of them who made it happen,joke.But still,i hate them for doing that. -.- even I know it was for fun,blahhh I didn't even get the chance to taste the cake I baked,how sad.Been thinking bout the cake lately,ok lol?

Im so tanned now cause of all this practice and picnic,but its worth it..somehow.

Well...now its time for me to have my fair skin back!! after so long,haha ima just gonna stay at home until this face right here be fair once more.Since there no more sports or anything after this,as sad as that may sound but its true alright nothing after this..ohh,how much i miss using my sport shoe,hahahha.just gonna let it be there full with dust,lol and gaining weight? T.T

Did i mention I've been coughing for idk how many weeks,since I come back from camp!

Cough cough coughing none stop,eat medicine somehow useless duh ofcourse useless if I only eat when I feel like to.Lol.And i hate PMS-ing I've been puking all night last night.. Its the worst feeling ever,you dont want to know.After eating medicine,it felt much better.

Sometimes,life is unfair you know?

Ok,gtg eat medicine now..Bye

Holidays is here

Hello everyone!Yes yes,a week holidays are finally here!

Finally I get to sleep and wake up late,so glaadd :)But,my test is right after the holidays.What a way to spoil my holidays,gotta study or else you know what.And wooaahhh!It has been ages since the last time I updated this blog,totally forgot that I got blog.Sorry!heh.Been very busy and lazy as usual.Din't actually online for the pass few weeks,was too lazy.Theres nothing much anyway,but that doesn't explain why I din't update my blog for months.Heh.Anywayyyy,can't believe its the month of March already!So fast,don't you think?

Its my dad's birthday today!Happy birthday daddy!Semoga panjang umur dan murah rezeki selalu,saya sayang daddy saya :) Thank you for everything <3 :)

Moving along,
Have you guys been in the situation when you got nothing to year but your wardrobe is full with cloths?
Wait,all girls has been in that situation.Its like nothing is there while everything is there,theres just nothing nor close to perfect.When you wanna wear that something,it went missing or you couldn't find it.Your room will end up very messy and still got nothing to wear!In the end you'll end up using the first thing you wore or something else you haven't try and had to clean up your room.Maybe it didn't happen to you,but it did to me.Theres even some stuff that I bought but I didn't use em.Wasting much?Thought of selling them but blah too lazy,for now.Someday maybe.

Till next time when Im not lazy enough to update,Assalamualaikum!

 I don't know where I'm going with my life anymore. Everytime I find something that makes me happy, it either goes away or something bad happens and the happiness goes away. I just want to stay happy forever.

& you come ruin everything

Yes,this feeling right here.Right now.Yes I hate that.

Take it away from me please,or atlease bring me away from here.Somewhere I don't have to think about all this stuff,It won't stop!Its killing me slowly..

Life is a roller coaster

Assalamualaikum everyone.Its page 12 of 366 today.

Its has been a week since school starts,wanted to update before but just to caught up with games.Hah!and also homeworks.Okay i lied.Theres not much homework yet that were given,for now.Hmm,talking about school theres not much different being in the same class with guys.Not much difference well maybe cause of the little amount of them.

Anyhow,still waiting for the answer that kills me slowly by just thinking bout it.

I go through my old stuffs and clean my room when I was supposed to be doing my work.Heh,its normal to me.Its like my hand will automatically arrange the stuff,I guess my hands were to diligent.And there I found those stuff that I wrote few years ago,about someone.By reading it I feel so dumb.Luckily I dint actually give it to the person,that was my plan at first.Or else I'll just embarrassed myself..Haha! &Guess what?I throw them away!Well,I had to.Past is past right?They won't even change to the person they were before.So why wasting time?Wake up!People need to understand that,including myself.Its just sad to see girls being all sad,crying,emotional all about one guy.That one lucky guy.Sigh* Okay wait,Im talking about myself too here -.-

Gotta go to sleep and tomorrow is Friday,Hoorayy!

Till then.

New year 2012.

Its 2 minutes to go to a brand new one year,which is 2012.

So,here I am saying happy new year everyone!All the best for this year,Im just here watching fireworks on tv 2.So yeahh

How I wish I can see the fireworks with you :( I miss you.

Till then.

Just so you know

Its like you don't even care anymore? Please tell me Im wrong.

If its true,just tell me &I'll go.I had enough pain,and I don't need some more.Sigh* I hate this.

Anyhow,Im still confused about which school am I going to.Hope that I'll make a good decision,with no regrets.I miss my friends.Can't wait to see them when school reopens!But,what if I moved?Im so sure Im going to miss them!Well,you gotta do what you gotta do.Theres still facebook right?And,It will be a lot of difference next year,with the different classmates and all.Separating is not fun.Distance is not fun.at all.

*Ya Allah,kau berikanlah aku kefahamanmu.Kau lakukan lah apa yang patut kau lakukan.aku serahkan segalanya kepadamu,hidup mati dunia akhirat dan segalanya sesungguhnya engkaulah satu-satunya yang Maha Esa.

Till next time,Assalamualaikum.

Negative thoughts?

Assalamualaikum everyone :)

All of a sudden I miss blogging,so here I am again in the early morning.I got my results few days ago,Im satisfied with it.Alhamdulillah,all the hard work pay off.But somehow I can't believe its true,for real?Hihi.Few more days to new year,can't wait for it!I still can't decide what school Im going to.What stream am I going to take.Im not even sure myself.What if I move school?I might regret myself for doing it,but hey it will only took 2 years?Well,maybe 2 years is a long time.But I will achieve some experience studying in a different school.Well,im not hoping to move.Okay,maybe a little bit.I wanted to try something new.

Might actually regret it,but its just for a while.Theres more to life,right?Its for my own future anyway.

Moving along..

Have you guys be in a situation where people asked to stop what are you doing but you don't know what to do?You've tried it before but end up failing again &again.I know we shouldn't have listen to what others say just follow your heart.But it ain't wrong for me to take it as an advice,right?Wait.I wanted to listen to them,just that my heart won't.Maybe it wasn't the right time,when the time has come.Things will happen.Right?*sigh.Skipped that.Curious.Yes,that one word makes everything gone wrong.(well,maybe not everything).Negative thoughts.Suspecting.Everything.I hate that.Same goes to honesty.Why can't people just tell the truth and not hurting someone else feeling?I hate when I get those feeling when I thought people were doing something bad behind my back and I started to suspecting stuff and everything goes wrong.Where nothing had happen actually.No?Maybe something had happened just that people shut it up just to protect our feelings?Seriously?People need to do that?Come on.

Im starting to fed up with having all this negative thoughts.

New year,just come to me already and make a different please.A good one.

I know you guys din't understand what am I mumbling here,well you don't have to.Im just expressing myself here..

Till then.

Do you ever feel like running away? Just suddenly leaving. No note, no warning. Just getting your shit, and leaving.

I do.

Why do pub is invented anyway?

Refers to tittle.

Again,tell me WHY?why is it even invented?

I hate this,syaitan betul.

My friday night

Its Friday night and im here laying on my bed...Not Awesome.At all.

For the past few days I've been wasting my time on this thing called Cafeland.Its a game,yes a game.On facebook.You guys should try them out,its quite fun.Entertaining.Its about having your own personal restaurant.You can choose what to cook and also customize your very own cafe.Well,ofcourse you need to collect money,nothing is free okay!Well,unless you get free gifts from your friends(who played,obviously).And hey,its not free neither cause it needed effort for you to ask those people to give you stuff.Like begging?Lol.I may be very annoying by asking people to send me stuff to anywho I saw playing that game,call me addicted huh?I even rather let myself be hungry just to wait for my dish to cook.

Okay,thats more than enough.Want to know more?Give it a try!

Theres my proof,wait!This is only a part of it,the other part I din't snap a picture.Don't understand?I played using 2 accounts of my facebook.Buyuk?Suka hati I lah.I even managed to addict this game to others x) I don't wanna play it alone okay?

Moving on,

Holidays so far so good,just that I spend half of my day sleeping.I only spend 12 hours waking up.Well,you can guess now what time I wake up ey?Hah.Anak dara la sangat.Anyway..I was wondering what type of school bag should I get?most importantly,where?It doesn't have to be expensive,just nice.Even if I buy it expensive and somewhere not in labuan,but in the end still have that someone whos having the same bag.For what?Am I right?No?Whatever.Every year I have to face the same problem.Just that,this year end up using my last last year bag.But that bag,has been very useful to its owner.I have been bringing it to most of the place I've been travelling.

Another problem I have to face,well not just me.Most of the teenagers in this world perhaps?

Holidays + Food = Fat.

Not good at all.Argg whatever,I am still gonna be me,myself.&people I love will still love me no matter what size I am.If they don't love you,the heck?Just forget about them and move on.Its useless,people love you for who you are,not what you are.

What am I mumbling about?

Bye.

**Oh yeah,I accidentally press the 'backspace' button & everything is gone!Damn,but thank god to the auto save,it was in draft.Thank to whoever made that auto save thingy,or else I'll be pissed that I've been typing here so long and thinking so hard what to tell,urg.

Ohyea,bye again.

Hope for the best,but prepare for the worst

• What do you do when you're stuck between something you thought it was right and others thought it was wrong?
  
• What do you do when you don't know your real feeling about something?
  
• What do you do when you wanted to change yourself to a better person but failed,and still repeating that bad attitude?
  
• What do you do when you're being ditch?
  
• What do you do when you're getting fat?
  
• What do you do when you're getting bank rup?
  
• What do you do when you wanted to change but don't know how?
  
• What do you do when you wanted something but you can't?
  
• What do you do when someone annoyed you but you don't wanna fight back?
  
• What do you do when you are so bored that you run out of idea that you wanted to eat but you can't cause you scare that you'll get fat?
  
  

Okay,stop with the craps and shit.
Here am I again,at late nights full of boredom,nothing to do.Talking craps,hoping for something to happen.Most importantly,hoping for a pizza magically appear in front of me right this moment.

Till next time.

Its worth it :)

As always

Assalamualaikum,

A brand new blog has started again -as always.But still with the same Url -for now.Yes,i deleted all the other post cause I feel so lame by reading it.School holiday starts today,well here I am to entertain you people with my lame boring stories.Hmm,thinking what to tell actually.Umm okay,my so called big exam PMR is over a month ago so can't wait for the result this December.Around Christmas maybe.So called present huh?All I can do is tawakal to Allah.

Holidays?
What can I describe about holidays?

• Sleep
• Online
• Eat

Yes,the 3 most basic thing and famous among teenagers.And of course that includes me!Sleep?Ohmy,do you know how great it feels to sleep?Can't even describe the feeling.Well for online cause I got nothing else to do,maybe there are something worth it to do but I don't know what?or maybe just lazy?Urgg,why is the attitude lazy even exist?W/o it,we teenagers can have good result!Sigh* anyway,when I get bored I find food,well its normal.Just ask other teenagers. WARNING: Not a healthy life style,follow at own risk.

That's about it,going to enjoy my late night sleep schedule now,surfing the net until I get bored.

Until then.